I will have you know that I have now typed and deleted, "Mau and Edmund are a pair of repressed idiots and there is nothing more to talk about," into this box four times. Ahem.
Mau and Edmund have an interesting relationship because, although they have a lot of similarities, they tend to respond to each other in somewhat volatile and unpredictable ways. Some of the time they'll end up having a discussion that becomes very honest and personal uncharacteristically quickly, because they're resonating strongly on a topic; sometimes in a situation that could go that way, they'll end up both getting really cryptic and distant, because they know they're capable of reflecting each others' feelings more than seems safe. Sometimes they can talk each other through moments of personal or ideological crisis with uncanny empathy, but sometimes it's an issue that they're too similar on or that they're both struggling with too closely in that moment and they just spiral further into crisis. Or sometimes they don't quite mesh and it's bizarrely more frustrating than not being able to communicate with a friend, because it's a little too much like not understanding your own thoughts. At least, that's Mau's experience of his more intense interactions with Edmund.
This is complicated by the fact that Mau is really not very self aware about any of this. He's had moments of being almost self-aware! There was one time back in Wonderland where they were both trying to do nice things for each other and neither of them wanted to let the other give him anything, and eventually Mau was just like, "Okay, but can we stop playing this game? It's tiring and I don't want to with you of all people." So when they get really ludicrous he can at least recognize it in the moment. But he hasn't spent any time examining his patterns of behavior around Edmund, so all he's really aware of is that he and Edmund are friends, and it's really nice generally, and Edmund can be pretty great to talk to about leadership and stuff, but sometimes it's puzzling and frustrating for reasons he doesn't understand. For the amount of time they've spent together, Mau feels surprisingly close to Edmund, but also surprisingly uncomfortable around him.
So yeah, Mau and Edmund are bros, and their friendship is usually mutually beneficial, but it's characterized by a metric fuckton of unresolved tension. I think this is why we are all fishhandsing at them OOCly and yelling "NOW KISS!!!!" at regular intervals? Because genuine regard for each other + affection + unresolved tension = makeouts! It's kind of a standard recipe.
Except not only are they both repressed, emotionally cautious, highly preoccupied, workaholic, kind of messed up questionably teenage boys who frequently struggle with whether or not personal happiness is even a valid goal for them at all, but I don't even know what kind of unresolved tension we're talking about here. I don't! I know it isn't sexual, although I do think it has the potential to turn into that under the right conditions (and I wish I knew what the right conditions were, because at this point I shamelessly ship them), but... aside from that, it's pretty undefined. And I think that for two boys who are typically quite reserved, it's a little bit alarming to be friends with someone who occasionally causes you to be weirdly demonstrative in public (eg. hilarious ticklefight, disney princess bird scene, etc).
Anyway! So that's how it stands at the moment: lots in common, lots of moments where they click very intensely with each other, lots of undefined, unresolved tension, but also an unfortunate ability to hit each other where it hurts and put each other on the defensive without meaning to or even really realizing. So I honestly still don't know where this is going to go or even what conclusion Mau will come to once he's thought things over... but at least now he is going to think things over.
I feel like I should talk about the kiss here, some. Mau was being very honest with how he explained it to Edmund after, when he said, "Mostly I was thinking... sometimes talking isn't everything. I wanted to give you a true and real answer for the stuff I wasn't talking about. And that seemed... right." He was also being honest when he told Josh it was a weird thing to do. He'll sometimes affectionately kiss people on the forehead or the cheek, but usually it's Cassie (who started it) or Apple (as a form of teasing, because she flusters really hard), or maybe sometimes Ven (who is super touchy-feely anyway). This is the first time he's kissed someone out of nowhere on the corner of the mouth, though, or done anything that physically forward at all.
It probably sounds pretty unconvincing to say it wasn't an expression of attraction, but it wasn't. It was, however, an expression of how Mau recognizes and appreciates that his relationship with Edmund is unique. It's different from any other friendship he's ever had, because it's more intense, because they keep seeming to reach strange truths about each other too quickly. Maybe it's more fair to say that there's emotional attraction without there being sexual attraction. A part of Mau really likes hanging out with Edmund because it's not like hanging out with anyone else, and that's the feeling he was acting on when he kissed him.
There's more I could say about how I think things could go, but that's how things are. And really in this relationship, there's so much potential for so many different outcomes that it's hard to predict. So we will see!
Tell me more about how Josh is handling Mau and Edmund and how that resonates with how he came out of the Ven/Roxas thing.
no subject
Mau and Edmund have an interesting relationship because, although they have a lot of similarities, they tend to respond to each other in somewhat volatile and unpredictable ways. Some of the time they'll end up having a discussion that becomes very honest and personal uncharacteristically quickly, because they're resonating strongly on a topic; sometimes in a situation that could go that way, they'll end up both getting really cryptic and distant, because they know they're capable of reflecting each others' feelings more than seems safe. Sometimes they can talk each other through moments of personal or ideological crisis with uncanny empathy, but sometimes it's an issue that they're too similar on or that they're both struggling with too closely in that moment and they just spiral further into crisis. Or sometimes they don't quite mesh and it's bizarrely more frustrating than not being able to communicate with a friend, because it's a little too much like not understanding your own thoughts. At least, that's Mau's experience of his more intense interactions with Edmund.
This is complicated by the fact that Mau is really not very self aware about any of this. He's had moments of being almost self-aware! There was one time back in Wonderland where they were both trying to do nice things for each other and neither of them wanted to let the other give him anything, and eventually Mau was just like, "Okay, but can we stop playing this game? It's tiring and I don't want to with you of all people." So when they get really ludicrous he can at least recognize it in the moment. But he hasn't spent any time examining his patterns of behavior around Edmund, so all he's really aware of is that he and Edmund are friends, and it's really nice generally, and Edmund can be pretty great to talk to about leadership and stuff, but sometimes it's puzzling and frustrating for reasons he doesn't understand. For the amount of time they've spent together, Mau feels surprisingly close to Edmund, but also surprisingly uncomfortable around him.
So yeah, Mau and Edmund are bros, and their friendship is usually mutually beneficial, but it's characterized by a metric fuckton of unresolved tension. I think this is why we are all fishhandsing at them OOCly and yelling "NOW KISS!!!!" at regular intervals? Because genuine regard for each other + affection + unresolved tension = makeouts! It's kind of a standard recipe.
Except not only are they both repressed, emotionally cautious, highly preoccupied, workaholic, kind of messed up questionably teenage boys who frequently struggle with whether or not personal happiness is even a valid goal for them at all, but I don't even know what kind of unresolved tension we're talking about here. I don't! I know it isn't sexual, although I do think it has the potential to turn into that under the right conditions (and I wish I knew what the right conditions were, because at this point I shamelessly ship them), but... aside from that, it's pretty undefined. And I think that for two boys who are typically quite reserved, it's a little bit alarming to be friends with someone who occasionally causes you to be weirdly demonstrative in public (eg. hilarious ticklefight, disney princess bird scene, etc).
Anyway! So that's how it stands at the moment: lots in common, lots of moments where they click very intensely with each other, lots of undefined, unresolved tension, but also an unfortunate ability to hit each other where it hurts and put each other on the defensive without meaning to or even really realizing. So I honestly still don't know where this is going to go or even what conclusion Mau will come to once he's thought things over... but at least now he is going to think things over.
I feel like I should talk about the kiss here, some. Mau was being very honest with how he explained it to Edmund after, when he said, "Mostly I was thinking... sometimes talking isn't everything. I wanted to give you a true and real answer for the stuff I wasn't talking about. And that seemed... right." He was also being honest when he told Josh it was a weird thing to do. He'll sometimes affectionately kiss people on the forehead or the cheek, but usually it's Cassie (who started it) or Apple (as a form of teasing, because she flusters really hard), or maybe sometimes Ven (who is super touchy-feely anyway). This is the first time he's kissed someone out of nowhere on the corner of the mouth, though, or done anything that physically forward at all.
It probably sounds pretty unconvincing to say it wasn't an expression of attraction, but it wasn't. It was, however, an expression of how Mau recognizes and appreciates that his relationship with Edmund is unique. It's different from any other friendship he's ever had, because it's more intense, because they keep seeming to reach strange truths about each other too quickly. Maybe it's more fair to say that there's emotional attraction without there being sexual attraction. A part of Mau really likes hanging out with Edmund because it's not like hanging out with anyone else, and that's the feeling he was acting on when he kissed him.
There's more I could say about how I think things could go, but that's how things are. And really in this relationship, there's so much potential for so many different outcomes that it's hard to predict. So we will see!
Tell me more about how Josh is handling Mau and Edmund and how that resonates with how he came out of the Ven/Roxas thing.